If you are a performer of any kind, you know how stressful it is to audition. The range of emotions you experience in the audition process is like being on a glass roller coaster over a canyon filled with cockroaches.
Stage 1: Denial
After the initial relief of the audition being over, there is a period of pretending that it didn’t happen in order to get through the first couple of days of waiting. This is in order to numb ourselves from the torture of constantly worrying about it. This is a time where one can exist and continue with the day-to-day stuff as normal.
Stage 2: Anger
This is when everything is annoying. Life sucks and nothing will make it better except hearing that you made it! Family members and friends should beware of a performer in this stage of post-audition anxiety. They will bite your head off if you even breathe wrong near them. Luckily, the anger will subside and make way for the next stage before the stupid poeps that auditioned you ever get back to you.
Stage 3: Bargaining
This is the “if only” stage. If only I had sung Lady Gaga, the one judge was DEFINITELY gay, I KNOW he would have liked that. If only I had worn my skinny jeans, they probably think I’m too fat for the role. If only I was a soprano, I know I could rock that solo better than that other girl. If only I’d tried that risky note, it would have blown them away. Often, this is also the time we bargain with singers passed, that if they could put in a good word with the big man upstairs, we would make sure that their legacy was kept alive.
Stage 4: Depression
That’s it. You’re awful at what you do, you might as well give up and get a desk job. There’s no point in carrying on anymore.
Stage 5: Acceptance
This is when you realize that one audition will not determine the rest of your performing career. This is when you accept that whatever the outcome is, you will NEVER stop doing what you love, because you have a talent that nobody else has. Your talent is unique and the world needs you to do you.
Once you have moved through all five of these stages, you will now be ready to audition for something and begin the torture process all over again. Break a leg!